Cyril's Application

Thank you for the clarification Toshi and Keo. I will keep those in mind. There were many misunderstandings in the past and I am sure we have not touched upon all of them. Especially since we probably forgot all about them by now haha. But if we remember things and we come across these topics in our future conversations, I'm sure we can discuss it and work things out.

Speaking of misconceptions, just incase anyone is mispronouncing my name in their heads, my name is pronounced like "Psi-ril" not "See-ril".

Also, unfortunately my IGN looks like it has random numbers at the end of it (0321). But this actually is my date of birth! Lol so that's March 21. I know names with numbers look pretty "noob" and I really wish I can change it nowadays but I carried this IGN since my younger years. I am known as another IGN these days.

lol I want to share a nostalgic memory I remembered.

Back when Mabinogi was new, when soloing rabbie dungeon was a feat of strength, I was actually connected with Casian, his brother JUSIN, Tiny, and Skyblue, the founders of Dreams.

We would dungeon together. Skyblue was my first role model in the game. He would have this upgraded claymore, run to mobs of monsters, and then WM them with good damage. I was really impressed with his build so I worked on copying him. Skyblue told me about WM and his equipments. Casian would always seem to be more concerned about training his life skills like herbalism during our dungeon runs. We would finish the dungeon while waiting for him to finally pick up those freakin herbs lol. Tiny was there too. Tiny was a strong mage. But I preferred Skyblue's build. I didn't talk much with Tiny. If Casian remembers, he can confirm these shared experiences with him if you ask him. I know he is hardly on anymore. xD

Skyblue was the original Dreams' leader back then and I was meaning to join Dreams as my first guild (I think I actually asked Casian, JUSIN, and Sky that was interested). I don't remember my exact reasons but I ended up choosing a different path. I joined Kodocha which was a social guild, then Zeroskills, and then Visions was made. As I got more involved with guilds, we spoke less with each other unfortunately. Skyblue did not play mabi for very long. Pretty soon I had to find someone else to copy lol.

This was my first impression with Dreams so I know it started out very good with good people. That's why I've always been skeptical whenever there were reports that Dreams was doing bad things. Maybe if my choices were different back then, I could have already been part of this beautiful community.

Hiya Cyril! I'd love to get to know ya abit at some point in game. I'll add ya today. (If not this somewhat this week than definitely next week)
What days work best for you? Any preference in mabi as to what you'd like to engage in? or any questions you may have prior to us meeting at some point?

Oh, and if I might add I get what you mean about that zoning off thing. I've had a few episodes myself in the past, and while my social life didn't suffer under it... My priorities did suffer as I began to think on more trivial things like what to focus upgrading rather than have I locked up all my windows and doors before going out. (Although that instance only happened once and no bad came out of it) Perhaps it's concern on past affairs? Maybe you just need long breaks from Mabinogi to right yourself? Is this the first time this has happened or have there been any previous episodes in the past when you've played Mabinogi.

How do you feel about not beeing a guild leader after so maby years? Some of our members believe you might want to raise your rank a bit fast within the guild.

Hi Tariku,

Thank you for your concern.

lol I've been zoning off a lot lately because I think I have been trying hard to remember a lot of things recently. I do feel embarassed that I can't seem to remember some people like Leidolf. This huge mental block is a bit frustrating. It's like I am fighting some kind of memory loss disease that made me forget part of who I was. It's frustrating and a bit depressing. But I am trying. xD

I'll be on maybe around 11:30 PM EST today so we can talk more then if you're available.
---

Leidolf,

Like I said I would like to stay away from any leadership roles at this time. I've already had my chance as a guild leader in the past. If anything, being a leader for so long makes me want to give new leaders a chance to show off. It's really not the appropriate time for me to make leadership decisions anymore. I can still give my input and guidance if needed but I do not want to "rank fast" within the guild.

Reading Toshi's application made me realize something.

As much as I like helping the community there is also a very competitive side of me. A factor that motivates me to do things is also "that need for competitiveness." But me and Toshi's competitiveness seem different.

Unfortunately my urge to help people combined with my competitive nature always positions me in the losing team. I do not like playing for the winning team lol. I remember now one of the reasons I did not join Dreams. For me it was more fun to be a rival of Dreams than to be a part of it. The challenge of trying to beat something much stronger than me was very satisfying to my competitive nature. Other examples of this is on FPS games I always join the disadvantaged team and on RTS games I prefer games where players start equal or my enemy having a slight advantage. xD

With that said maybe you guys can help me think about this. I realize that I need to remain competitive to truly enjoy my time here. As a returning old player, do you think there are opportunities for me to remain competitive?

Hello,

Sorry about this. After giving Mabinogi a lot more thought, I have decided that I can't get back to Mabinogi and as a result I am withdrawing my application.

Mabinogi is just so different now and it does not have the competitiveness and community anymore that would make me enjoy the game.

I really do apologize for wasting everyone's time. I will miss everyone. Even though I've only met some of you shortly, you guys seem like fun people.

Leslie we'll just have to be best friends another time when we get a chance to mingle more. =P

Leidolf I am sorry for not remembering. I am pretty embarrassed about it. I hope you forgive me.

Whimsy it sounds like you have so many ideas. I'm sure a lot of people would like to hear them!

Chance, keep asking for help and guidance if you need it. But have more confidence in yourself. You might surprise yourself what you can do on your own.

Hotpocket I wish we got to know each other more. Being old players we probably have the same perspective on a lot of things.

Gilbert I've known you since Visions. You have a wonderful influence in the community. Keep being Gibby! xD

Hiroki, the last time we spoke we had an argument. I told you I would never forgive you. But I understand people grow by learning. Like me, I've learned a lot from my losses. Keep learning Hiroki.

Toshi, take care of Haya. Do not let me some stupid game ruin your friendship.

Casian you panda! You never replied to my application.

Keo, people say we're different but I feel we are pretty similar. Dreams needs your guidance but do not ever forget to take care of yourself too.

Tairiku you seem like a kind person. You do not have to wait for me today at 6 PM CST. I may not be around to log in to Mabi anymore.

I might stick around the forums even if I won't be around mabi (if that's okay). Mabinogi has been one my sources for creative inspiration, so I might still revisit in the future (but maybe not play).

Speaking of which, if you liked the tune I made for Dreams. Here is the piano sheet music for it so maybe you can try playing it yourself!
[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

So unfortunately this is good bye (again). But I'll be lurking Dreams' and Visions' forums from time to time!

It's unfortunate we have to see you go :C
Take care in life but do stop by and say hi sometime

Yea, despite the turn out it was nice to meet you miss and I wish you the best wherever you go.

It is a shame to see you go after all the hard work put into your application. I hope you will still log into the game just to chat or at least keep in touch?

Competitiveness in Mabinogi is relative though sadly. One year it can mean one thing, and several years later, the term can mean something utterly different. My urge to constantly be striving for better.. but it has indeed waned since my earlier days. More harder now with school and a full time job.

As for Haya, he'll be in good hands. A game that's only been around 7 yrs can't break a friendship of 20+ can it? I'd like to think our friendship would be able to stand the test of time at the rate it's going.

Cyril, you are right to see that the game has changed from what it once was. Competition, especially from pvp are no longer main priorities. You are also correct to realize that it will be hard for other players to relate to your experiences of Mabinogi.

I will say that I too admired the past Mabinogi for what it was. However, the new Mabinogi also has a lot to offer as well, and that is the source of my latest visits to the game.

The next time you log on, you may find the other great sides of Mabinogi, and play for those reasons. Just in a new way ^^

I  also want to add that most, if not all, the members here acknowledge your level of dedication and determination to the Visions guild, and that amount of work is greatly admired.

If a time comes that you find a new passion for Mabinogi, Dreams may still be the guild that you belong in.

With that said, I wish you the best of success~

Thank you Gilbert, Tairiku, Toshi and Hotpocket.

I will probably be logging in to the game the next few days just to talk to people. I'm thinking if I should give me account to someone or not. I know how hard it is to invite a new friend to Mabinogi and then they have to start as a new character. Maybe someone can use my character instead so then it would be easy to bring a new friend over.